Thursday, May 28, 2015

Only the Best



I am an optimist. Sometimes I forget that I am, but deep down, the positive is what my heart always clings to. When a stressful situation comes along, my immediate reaction is to forget about it, so that I can stay happy. I think a lot of us are like that. We want to believe that life is good and that there is beauty ahead for us. We want to lead hope-filled lives.

The topic of hope has been on my mind lately. Since the beginning of the year, as I already wrote about, I have been on a journey of regaining hope. And I have been surprised at what I have found. I often feel like the psalmist declared, “my cup runneth over” (Psalms 23:5).

Some recent experiences have reminded me of this hopeful feeling. As many around me, I recently visited the Payson Temple Open House. (Side note: I wanted to finish this post before the open house ended on May 23, so that I could get people excited about going, but my thoughts have not come together until now.)

To me, the Payson Temple was unlike most any other LDS temple that I’ve ever seen. It was absolutely breathtaking. If you’d like to see pictures of this magnificent temple click here. The detail put into the architecture- the furniture, the lovely stain-glass windows- was incredible. I felt like I was inside a palace.

As we walked into the celestial room, a room representing Heaven, I was stunned. I remember thinking, I don’t know if I deserve to be here. But almost immediately this thought came to my mind, Anneli, you deserve every good thing.

Now, this is a significant sentence that has stayed with me. Earlier this year I was in a relationship with a sweet boy who would often tell me that very same phrase. Every time He said that to me, it felt as if God, Himself was saying those very words to me. So naturally, when that phrase came to mind in the temple, I knew where it came from. And I felt hope.

Many times in the past 5 months I have felt hope fill me. It came after I wasn’t accepted to nursing school for the third time and found myself angry with God. But I learned my lesson as I yelled at Him. I learned being angry with God can only be a temporary thing.

I remember one day after being so angry with Him, I started to cry and to apologize in prayer for my anger. The overwhelming feeling that came to me that day was to just trust Him.

Just trust Him.

It was as if He was pleading with me.

So I started living my life that way: trusting Him and breathing hope into my life. I moved on from hurt. I didn’t let it touch me. I found strength from deep down inside me to move forward and to face the future with excitement. Many people rallied around me and buoyed me up. All of a sudden, my life was filled with light, even with the absence of some things that I had wanted so bad.

My relationship with others and with God grew.

And I felt happy.

I am a big believer that good things come to those who are happy and optimistic. Sometimes those good things are just a fresh look the life you already have. Sometimes those things are greater relationships. Sometimes the Lord helps you to radiate your happiness to touch the lives of others.

But those good things do come.

For me, recently something pretty good did come. And when I least expected it.

At the beginning of May I was working one day at the hospital. It was a pretty long day and I was exhausted, but in one of my rare lulls when I didn’t have anything pressing to do, I checked my phone and saw that I had received an email from Weber State University.

Let me give some background info first. When I applied to nursing school this year, I planned to apply only for the program at University of Utah because their short program made the most sense for someone who already had a bachelor’s degree. I put most of my effort into making sure that application was perfect. Then, almost as an afterthought, I applied to Weber State University.

When I heard back from both programs, I heard from University of Utah first that I did not make the cut. Then, a few weeks later, I found out that I had a spot on the alternate list at Weber State. Though there was a chance, I still didn’t plan on making it in this year.

So, back to the email. It said that they had an open spot and that they wanted to know if I was interested.

Well, I was.

I couldn’t believe it! My plans changed completely with that little email.

One thing that moment really taught me was that I should believe in myself. That good things could come my way. That my dream could become a reality.

I prayed so hard that night and many times since in gratitude.

As I have tried to decide what to do (and it sounds like an easy decision, I know) I have struggled to feel complete peace about attending Weber State. I don’t know why that is. But what I can say is that I am moving forward with faith and with hope with the plan of going to nursing school in the fall and fulfilling a nearly life-long dream of becoming a nurse. If not, there will be a better plan, I’m sure. I know that because I know that God is a God of goodness. I was reading the other day and read this passage: “In Christ there should come every good thing.” (Moroni 7:22)

My message to you today is that God is good. He has great plans ahead. Trust Him, please.

Don’t settle for anything less than His best.

We are His children and He only wants to give us His best. We don’t deserve it of our own 
accord, but yet, He wants to give it to us.


Believe that.